Posts Tagged: scripture

A Conversation with God

Posted August 6, 2015 | Karisa Moore

I want answers. God wants trust.

I feel like a kid asking, “Please explain your plan to me.”

“That is not what you really want.” God gently corrects. “You want Jonathan’s death to mean something, for beauty to spring from the ashes of your heartache and you do not trust that I will give you 100 fold what I have taken from you. Have I not laid out my promises to you through scripture, and in our personal relationship?”

“I don’t know.” I shrug. “I just want my remaining kids to be okay–to help others struggling with depression.”

“Do I not want the same?”

“Yes, but you don’t do things the way I would.”

“Exactly.”

“Why this path, why Jonathan, why this amount of pain? I want answers Lord!”

“No, you want your answers Karisa. Not mine.”

Silence. Can I live with this God whose ways are not my ways?

Isaiah 55:8-9 8“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. 9“For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts.

Numbers 23:19 God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?

Comment
Share

Bearing Weakness: Edifying our Neighbor

Posted August 2, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Romans 15:1 Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves. 2Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.…

A hard evening for my son. I sat rocking him as he grieved. No words were needed, they will not wash away the heartache he feels, and a Star Wars Band-Aid will not cover his wounds. I silently cried out to my heavenly daddy on my son’s behalf, and let God’s comfort wash over Daniel’s heart. God can get at those places that I cannot.

What do you do in those moments that others suffer? How do you respond to their grief? You may be dealing with a host of your own problems, and it feels like a heavy burden to sit and rock someone as they cry. Dear sister and dear brother we all are broken, and we all are grieving something. We all need to be held.

A neighbor mowed our lawn today. It means so much to me that they reached out. It is hard to accept aid from others, but that is the pride talking. Let others lift your burdens. What my neighbor did for us, enabled me to be present with Daniel. Jesus shared our burdens on the cross–he died to lighten our load! When we treat our neighbors as God treated us, we aren’t just sharing each others burdens, we share each other’s worth. You are valuable to me! You are a treasure! You are worth rocking and being held in your grief.

Comment
Share

Turning the Page on Arrogance

Posted July 24, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Isaiah 55:8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. 9For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

If I were God, chocolate and coke would never add to my weight, my husband would be my fairytale prince, my children would obey without question, and I would never allow another child to be lost to suicide. Just in writing the above sentence I notice that your desires are not reflected. Every last bit of what I just wrote are my own wants. But isn’t this an accurate depiction of our thoughts? We often measure God by the shallowness of our own thinking. One only needs to look at Jesus to see that God shatters the way that individuals, society, our government and our world thinks.

Man’s Thinking =All roads lead to heaven vs. God’s Thinking= Narrow is the path that leads to righteousness (right living) and wide is the path that leads to destruction (Matthew 7:13-14)

Man’s Thinking = Self Preservation vs. God’s thinking= If you want to gain your life you have to lose it (Luke 7:33)

Man’s Thinking = We build our governments vs. God’s thinking = Daniel 2:21 . . .He removes kings and establishes kings; . . .

I am arrogant in my man centered thinking. I judge God by what I would do in his place. I question the goodness of his plan. Arrogance means: an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions. (Merriam-Webster).  A close relation to arrogance is arrogate: to take or claim (something, such as a right or a privilege) in a way that is not fair or legal. Both literally mean “away from asking”.  And at the heart of arrogance is a lack of submission to God’s will.  I struggle to ask God his thoughts on healing the heartache and brokenness so many experience.

Have you ever been blindfolded and had to trust others to lead you? Fine in familiar territory, but would you trust others to lead you safely across a busy street? That is what trusting God is often feels like for me. Except my blindfold is sin. God is asking me to trust his goodness, his will, his upside down plan that results in a perfect plan for the salvation of many.

I WANT TO SEE WHERE I’M GOING! Our trust stops where we lose control of the path to the final outcome. I am totally out of control of the path to turning the page on the suicide epidemic. That is hard. To trust that God cares more for what is happening to us, our friends and family who suffer depression, mental illness, and despair than I do, takes an acceptance of his upside down plan. I want to be God in turning ending this nightmare, yet his way is often through slavery, deserts, pits, and loss.

But oh my goodness do I want the results!!! Joseph, is one of the Old Testament men who is a founding rock of my faith. He was almost murdered, sold into slavery, falsely accused, thrown into prison and forgotten by man, but God showed him favor. God lead him (blindfolded by his own version of the dream) into second in command to pharaoh! In this position he saves many nations from famine and rescues his own family from certain death. Not the path Joseph saw coming, but he trusted God to lead him through anything. Can you and I trust God to lead us to an outcome that will always save many?

Comment
Share

I Am Not Picasso, I’m the Brush: Learning to Glorify God Not the Words I Write

Posted July 20, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Philippians 2:5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

6Who, being in very naturea God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very natureb of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!

Do we make ourselves nothing as Christians? I have been working to remove idols from my life this month. And there are many. A person handed me In His Steps when I was young, sharing the challenge of asking, “What would Jesus Do?”, in all aspects of our lives. I read it, attempted to ask “what would Jesus do”, and fizzled out very quickly. Why? Because, doing what Jesus would do, does not include being the center of praise. I seek the comfort of worthiness in man’s eyes, not God’s pleasure.This is an idol. I worship at the feet of human praise.

Everything in this world points towards praising the individual. It is an accepted practice–even by the church. When we applaud or give standing ovations to the work of our musicians, our pastor and ourselves are we giving God the glory? Please hear me, I am simply asking our motivation. The answer is between you and your maker. We have shows boldly calling themselves “American Idol”. Idol is not a bad word on our lips, it is someone with gifts and talents to admire. And some even acknowledge God for their talents, but it isn’t God we admire on that stage.

When you read my writing does God take center stage, or do I? I want his mighty works to be what you see. “When you see a great Picasso, da Vinci or Rembrandt. Do you ever sing the praises of their brush. It’s the master of the masterpiece who deserves the praise. Not the paint they use-blue, green, or blush. So don’t praise me if I do something wonderful . . .” (From the movie In His Steps)

Do we find ourselves needing praise to do a good job, or are we doing each aspect of our life to the glory of God? Taking on the very nature of a servant. Guaranteed we’ll be called “Jesus Freaks”, but there are worse things I could be called–such as an idol.

Comment
Share

My Spiritual Tool Box: What do I Use When Grief Overwhelms Me?

Posted May 29, 2015 | Karisa Moore

As I awoke this morning I was immediately hit with going over ever last minute detail leading up to Jonathan’s death. It is in these moments that I pull out every tool in my tool box.

Prayer: Lord, you know that my heart’s longing is for Jonathan to be here–to live. Please Lord, fill me with your love. Direct my mind to what is doable for me today. May you be enough for me. Amen.

Scripture: Lamentations 3:31For no one is cast off by the Lord forever. 32Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. 33For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to anyone.

Romans 8:31What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?

John 16:22So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. 23In that day you will no longer ask me anything. Very truly I tell you, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 24Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.

Fellowship: Headed into the office to work. . . bringing Daniel’s joke book. 😉

Witnessing: I share with you my grief, my hope, and my God with you today. May you find comfort in your afflictions, hope in your grief, and love and compassion for those around you.

Comment
Share

Tempo is discipline!: Finding our God given beat

Posted April 21, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Matthew 11:16 “But to what shall I compare this generation? It is like children sitting in the marketplaces and calling to their playmates,

17“‘We played the flute for you, and you did not dance;

we sang a dirge, and you did not mourn.’

18For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ 19The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Look at him! A glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ Yet wisdom is justified by her deeds.”

Today I got a lesson on rhythm. I used a metronome to help my son find the beat for his violin lessons. He is learning eighth notes; having to stay in tempo has had him tangled up and frustrated. In an instant he went from haphazard, it sorta sounds like “Can-Can” to it really sounds like “Can-Can”.

Now just to be clear, I love beat when others are creating it, and actually gravitate towards rap music, which emphasizes beat. If you see my minivan windows vibrating, now you know why. You will often see a rapper moving his or her hands in a back and forth motion that are short and long. They are staying within a structured meter.

I struggle with keeping tempo in my writing even though I studied the meter greats for my writing degree. I found trying to squish words into a rhythm annoying! Just let the words have their say was my belief. Unfortunately it wasn’t my teachers belief and this course was my lowest score in English. Beats, whether in writing or music, are discipline and they matter! And I STRUGGLE with disciple! I feel that what I’m trying to say gets lost in the beats, or the beat gets lost in what I’m trying to say.

Obviously it not an impossible task because many talented writers and musicians find the beat. The rapper and beat become partners, singing to and around each other; plotting out poetry that is flexible, alive and active. But can I create a beat myself? Can my writing set a tone in your lives? Absolutely! Jesus’ ministry was Allegro (fast and upbeat), whereas John the Baptist’s preparation was Grave. Why were two God commissioned men preaching so differently? John was the transition from the law of sin (death), to abundant life in Jesus Christ! They both set different tones with the music they played, but both brought repentance, redemption, and restoration to those chosen and willing to follow. It says that there is an order and purpose in each note that we play. It also says to me that each of us will play our own God given tempo. The things that don’t change are Christ provider of our beat, prayer, scripture, fellowship, and witnessing. Every single powerhouse in scripture had these five disciplines as part of their music. Some of us may be playing Ode to Joy and others Visee-Allemande Grave, but both take discipline . . . who knows, with God’s help I may try my hand once more at that iambic pentameter.

Comment
Share

Depression, an Opportunity to Change the World

Posted April 18, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Read Nehemiah 2:1-3 And it came about in the month Nisan, in the twentieth year of King Artaxerxes, that wine was before him, and I took up the wine and gave it to the king. Now I had not been sad in his presence. 2So the king said to me, “Why is your face sad though you are not sick? This is nothing but sadness of heart.” Then I was very much afraid. 3I said to the king, “Let the king live forever. Why should my face not be sad when the city, the place of my fathers’ tombs, lies desolate and its gates have been consumed by fire?”…

Speaking up about depression brings about change! Remaining silent keeps us stuck with our own limited resources. But, what do we do when we are depression spills over at work? Is it worth the risk sharing our struggle with our boss, our coworkers?

Nehemiah’s job left no room for mistakes. He was the cupbearer for Artaxerxes, a powerful king who would not have tolerated down cast servants in his court, even if they were friends. But, today when he punched his time card for work, his mind wasn’t on serving the king, it was on the ruins of Jerusalem and the king can tell something is not right. Nehemiah has just finished fasting and praying for help in the 1st chapter. Could the king be the answer to his prayer? He is afraid because his depression is now exposed to his boss. God has given him favor with the king, but is it enough?

With depression comes possibility. Things are not okay! Maybe there are legit reasons why we mourn. There is so much suffering and oppression in the world, and our depression is the chasm between our reality and how the world should be. The quicker we acknowledge our desire for relief, the sooner resources come. Certainly Nehemiah’s is down cast for good reason. Israel is in ruins and in chapter 1 he declares that it is because Israel turned their back on God. He cries out to God. He doesn’t try to dismiss his anguish, or put on a happy pretend face which might have kept him safe. He risks speaking the truth. The king gives Nehemiah charge over rebuilding the city walls and gates and even sends letters for materials to be provided. Change occurred because of Nehemiah’s depression was out in the open!

The whole world suffers from depression. Those of us who recognize things are not as they should be have an opportunity to make the world a better place. Since Adam’s fall into sin, we went from walking with God, to hiding, from enjoying the good things given to us to despising, and from satisfaction in God alone to seeking position, possessions and power to determine our worth. There is not a single human being or animal that was not affected by the curse of sin and death. Since depression is the natural state and consequence of our disobedience, what hope do we have?

Nehemiah. . .

  • Acknowledged—took note of—his reality
  • He mourned and laid out his heartache before God
  • He fasted and prayed
  • Shared his burden with his friend, the King
  • He spoke up
  • The king provided
  • He trusted God and began to rebuild

What makes us sorrowful? Depression is a good only when we allow it to motivate us towards change. I am aware that some of you who follow my blog are in daily pain physically and emotionally. There seems to be no relief from what you are experiencing. My heart aches for you. Don’t lose heart, don’t give up! Take one step today to open yourself to God’s resources. Nehemiah’s burden didn’t just appear over night, the ruins of Jerusalem were years in the making (a product of their rejecting God, and being taken captive by Babylon). I promise you that God is faithful, and I appreciate your honesty! May the exposure of our depression bring resources to rebuild our lives and those around us.

My son’s death has opened my heart wider for others who are tempted to despair. God has placed me in the unique position of experiencing abuse, suffering depression,chronic physical pain, and bearing overwhelming loss. Like Nehemiah I cannot hide my sorrow. So do I speak boldly of the need for our hopelessness to change? Yes, I may get some push back, but it is so worth speaking about suicide. Depression is a heavy weight on my spirit and I refuse to share it alone. Resources are coming! Don’t stop crying out!

Comment
Share

Christians, MacGyvers of Faith: Using our God given Resources in all circumstances

Posted March 30, 2015 | Karisa Moore

Christians are “MacGyvers”. Doubt me? Check out Acts 16 for an action packed escape from prison. PauI and Silas blew up the gates with hymens and prayer.

Today, I started re-watching MacGyver, one of my favorite shows as a kid. He got out of some pretty tight spots and saved the day a lot. I used to wish that I could create things out of gum, paperclips, string and of course, his trusty Swiss Army Knife. As a Christian, I too have to use the resources at hand, to get through trials. Paul says, “I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.” (Philippians 4:12)​ Sometimes my faith leads me on missions that test the limits of what is humanly possible. The loss of my precious son on this earth, certainly qualifies. Turning the Page on Suicide, my mission, won’t be solved in an hour. I am having to use everything that God has taught me, and acknowledge where I am weak. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

My toolkit includes:

Bible

Prayer

Church

Experiences

Holy Spirit

Brothers and Sisters in Christ

You could say that my Swiss Army Knife is the Bible—useful for teaching, correcting, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness. (2 Tim 3:16) My gum and paperclips are the experiences I have of God’s faithfulness, and prayer is my life-line in all situations. But, unlike MacGyver, I never work alone. The Holy Spirit guides me to the tools that I need, and is currently helping me in the circumstances of being a survivor of suicide. God is proving himself faithful and that he does not leave me to figure out my plan alone.

So no, I may not have to unstrap myself from a bomb that is about to detonate, but I do have some pretty difficult circumstances to navigate, however long I’m here on earth. Some Christians are called to stand in some pretty hot fiery furnaces. That takes all the resources God has to help me and like MacGyver, I must open my eyes to all the possible tools at my disposal.

Comment
Share
Suicide & Prevention Hotline

National Suicide Hotline

If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call the National Suicide Lifeline at 988 or go to the website at https://988lifeline.org/