Posts Tagged: trauma

When Trauma Has You Frozen, Pray

Romans 8:15 For you did not receive a spirit of slavery that returns you to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

I do not grieve like someone who is a slave to my son’s death. Sometimes, just like the Romans, I need a reminder that I can cry out to my daddy when fear is attempting to chain me again.

Yesterday I met a friend to study scripture and pray together. I made it through all the markers of Jonathan’s death and did not break down. But grief is not dictated by routine or schedule.

As I walked into the restaurant two police officers were waiting in line to place their order. I have yet to overcome a visceral response to police officers, since it was a sheriff who had to deliver the news that my son was dead. Every encounter since has been sweaty palms, shaking, and near breakdown.

I want to overcome this reaction, but am not sure how. My friend, aware of my struggle asked if I was okay when I came to the table. I struggled to not completely melt into tears. She assured me, it is okay if I cry, each moment is valuable, even the hard ones. We began catching up, but the officers sat only a few booths away and I was barely holding it together.

Finally I asked, “Can you do me a favor? . . . Oh, never mind.”

But my friend wisely didn’t leave it at that. “You want me to ask them if there is anything we can pray for them?”

All I could do was nod.

They asked her to pray for their safety, and we did just that. She redirected my overwhelmed feeling into meaningful, and purposeful care for these two men. As a result it also brought peace and calm to my soul.

What are you facing right now that causes an uncontrolled, physical response? It doesn’t make logical sense, but you can’t stop reacting to past trauma. I encourage you, just as my friend took the reigns and led me through the dark moment, to find a purpose in your grief. Begin with prayer. Lift up the person, circumstance, or fear to God who loves you perfectly and can cast out all fear!

Love Always,

Karisa

 

Prayer:

God the Ultimate Health Coach: Prospering in more than the spiritual

Endorphins

” Exercise gives you endorphins–Endorphins make people happy and happy people just don’t shoot their husbands. . .they just don’t.” (Legally Blond)

A friend  gave me a pass for 30 days of jazzercise. I can not emphasize enough, whether walking or exercising in a group setting, moving the body is vital to healing from trauma. This week I was stuck. Stuck in my thinking, stuck in overwhelmed mode, and stuck in my reactions to life.

Taking action on the spiritual level was a first good step, and today as I worked my weary muscles I was happy. It was a good kind of ache at the end of class. The kind that says, “That a girl, keep going!” My goal is to be what John describes in 3rd John 1:2-3. “Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. 3For I was very glad when brethren came and testified to your truth, that is, how you are walking in truth.” If Christ came that we might have abundant life then that doesn’t just stop at the spiritual realm. Can you imagine in all aspects of your life prospering? Wow!

This isn’t greed. We tend to limit the word prosper to just money or economic success, but Merriam-Webster defines prosper: to become strong and flourishing or to cause to thrive. How many of us settle for the plain of existence we’re on and never realize abundant life? I’ll be transparent with you, there are many areas that don’t feel prosperous in, but I have witnessed people who at one time stood in my shoes and felt the same way. But they began walking in truth and they now thrive in life. To walk in the truth is to believe the gospel and be a living example of God’s love for humanity. As I journey in all areas my faith walk, my prayer is that one day I can cause others to thrive. For now may our endorphins increase as we move towards abundant life.

Turning the Page no Matter What: Forming routine in the midst of crisis

1 John 1:1That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we looked upon and have touched with our hands, concerning the word of life— 2the life was made manifest, and we have seen it, and testify to it and proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and was made manifest to us— 3that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ. 4And we are writing these things so that oura joy may be complete. ESV

My children have struggled to head back to school. Two weeks of being out, one of those weeks in a different time zone have wreaked havoc on their routine. They are grumpy, hyper, and testing the limits of bedtime and routine. Yet they need structure and order.

For that matter, so do I. Routine is vital in healing from the trauma of any kind. My son’s suicide has forced me to simplify (my brain simply cannot store any sort of useful information right now), to write notes, to weed my schedule down, and to limit my interactions with people who drain what little energy that I have.

My husband and I went into Christmas with a plan and it was a good one. It aided us in saying no when we needed to, guarding each other’s hearts, and in creating new memories to cherish Jonathan. God blessed and honored our commitment with surprises around every corner, reminding us of his presence with us! Thank you Lord.

The future spread out before me is daunting. I must take each day one at a time, just as Jesus did. Jesus knew he was headed toward the cross and he maintained a routine of prayer, scripture, fellowship, and witnessing. The burden of walking towards the cross was broken down into daily pieces that fit perfectly in God’s plan. The four spokes of the wheel illustration I mentioned in an earlier post, aren’t just nice ideas. They are the daily routine that keep us focused and reliant upon the will of God! As we are strengthened in each, the crosses we bear are not a burden in the light of his love and God’s plan for salvation. Lord, give me enough for today. Amen

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Suicide Hotline

National Suicide Hotline

If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call the National Suicide Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or go to the website at  SuicidePreventionLifeline.org.