Posts Tagged: writing

When God Hits the Pause Button in Our Faith

“There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience” (Hebrews 4:9-12).

God stopped me in my tracks a few months ago. Absence may or may not cause the heart to grow fonder with you readers of Turning the Page on Suicide, but God will do what he sets out to do, with or without my help. I’d rather be a part of his plan, which became clearer, once I stopped banging my head against the wall I thought was writer’s block. God put a flaming sword in my path (see Balaam’s Donkey for more information), I found peace in the silencing of my very busy keys. God has been my muse this whole journey, but somewhere along the journey, I slipped into doing rather than being a witness to you.

In this time of stepping back, God is giving me rest, reminding me of where my help comes from and opening my eyes to new possibilities. “Dream bigger,” he tells me. Just even saying those words gives me delightful goosebumps. The Holy Spirit and I are in constant conversations and he is teaching me to rest in him.

The pause button isn’t the end, but a chance for the refreshment of our spirit, a course correction, or getting new marching orders so that we can fulfill God’s purpose For me it has been a little of all the above. I sat with God, meditating on scripture and studying his character in Ezekiel. He is showing me his justice on a deeper level. He has given me a childlike faith as I play in nature with my camera. And I grow closer to my husband and children through fuller presence and prayer.

Adventures have included speaking to a women’s retreat two weeks ago and a writer/speaker conference this past weekend. God is pouring into me and preparing me for some demanding things that will take a discipline of spirit I lack. These past few months (again, once I stopped beating my writing into submission) is such a sweet and refreshing time. I feel established and rooted in love.

God will always correct, train, and prepare those who stay within His will. Have you hit a perceived wall? Sit there, not in a pout, but in submission. God, what do you want to teach me? Who should I connect with? Run through your spiritual checklist:

  • Am I in the word?
  • Who am I allowing to speak life into me?
  • Do I listen to the Spirit’s counsel?
  • Am I witnessing for the gain of my audience or my own affirmation?

The last is crucial as a writer and follower of Jesus Christ. Knowing that God is well pleased in me matters far more than any other voice in my life. Where do you garner praise? Lean into God’s love for you and if he is hitting the pause button, realize he is preparing you for exceedingly great things.

Love,

Karisa

Heaven’s Christmas

I hang fragile memories

on a fragrant tree, while Silent Night

sings lullabies of human

understanding. And I

wonder–What is Christmas

like in heaven?

 

Does the soft glow of windowed candles

flicker for us in prayer, while carolers

harmonize glory hymns to the

Holy One? Do angelic hosts gaze down

upon star topped heavens and

praise God for creation?

 

God, do you laugh deeply as you watch a soul

unwrap heaven like an eager child? Their eyes wide with

wonder as they experience first sounds, vibrant colors.

and run their fingers over the texture of your love.

 

Are we your present, your delight?

 

 

Good morning Lord

Matthew 25:20 And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here I have made five talents more.’

Father, I raise my hands to you. Thank you for Daniel and Natalie who fill our house with laughter and adventure. What a precious gift my hard working husband is; teach me to bless and treasure him as you desire to bless him. I praise you for my many sisters and brothers in Christ. Truly I am never alone!

Open my eyes to heaven, that I may more clearly see your mighty acts poured over the earth. Strengthen my body so that I can serve you without reserve. Help me to get to know the spirit that you have placed in me and equip me to fight despair, lifting others out of the pit as you have lifted me! Father, it is your will that none perish and I come into agreement with your will.

You have gifted writing to me! I return the gift to you like the servant entrusted with five precious talents. May my delight in glorifying you increase! Amen.

Dusty Realities

Dreams–dusty realities

removing time and distance

Like a movement of dissidence, tucked into a symphony of

reason. You are a memory that makes no sense, resurrected by heartache,

sewn together by longing, until the persistent alarm shatters my dreams

to a heavy concrete world without you.

Turn the Page Ballad

Words spoken . . .you promised never to say

and he’s hurt and turned away.

Broken dreams widen the gap

Between wedding vows and the life you unwrap.

A single word frozen like a knife,

Ready to cut the oneness committed for life.

But, he turns, his hands cup your face

The condemnation you expect—grace.

“Do we stop the story here or turn the page?

Am I still your knight, ready to engage,

Fight whatever battles that come our way,

Bend my knee to lift you up and pray?

Do we allow this struggle to make us stronger.

And hold on for just a bit longer.

Do we turn the page?”

Teenager caught between holding it together and living a lie.

No longer sure whether to live or die.

You’ve been told that anything goes

And your drinking is just being one of the Joes.

You stagger home to your mother’s worried embrace,

No longer able to meet her eye, such a disgrace.

But, she cries out to the one who hears.

Seeking hope through her many tears.

“Do I stop the story here or turn the page?

Do I continue to love him through his rage;

Lay him upon the alter of your care?

Let go and have peace that you are aware.

Do I allow the struggle to make me stronger

And hold out for just a bit longer?

Do I turn the page?”

Your heart cries out to know the truth!

What’s your story, what will your life produce?

The only way to ever know the answer to what happens in the end

Is to turn the page and let a new day begin.

Do you allow life’s struggles to make you stronger

And hold onto the truth just a bit longer?

When faith is fading fast

And you’re sure your role has already been cast

Turn the page your story is not done

God’s the author and he has already won!

He knows our darkest page,

His son turned it and death lost its sting . . .

Do we stop the story here or turn the page?

Hold onto each other in prayer.

Hold onto each other in prayer.

Unwound Routine: A Limerick

Snow falls heavy to the ground

My kids’ routine unwound

Sent out to play

Never to stay

So, hot chocolates all around.

 

Calloused Hand of a Bard: Limerick 2

No doubt my journey is calloused hard,

Perfect life maligned and marred.

Laughter a soothing balm,

And writing softens and calms.

Such is the hand of a bard.

Welcome, New Page Turners!

Dear Page Turner,

Today my page has been filled to the brim and running over. I wanted to take a moment to welcome the newcomers, thank you for your comments and support. As this blog grows it is my hope that it becomes a resource, encouragement, and lifeline to those effected by suicide and depression. Which, I am finding, touches just about all of us in some way. You may have a friend, loved one or even a complete stranger that you are concerned for. Don’t hesitate to reach out, be present, or sit with them. Be sure to vote in the poll I have set up. Your answers will help me to form content for new posts, and create resources for you as you engage those around you. Feel free to share it with your readers.

Continue to write your open page turners, I want to read what happens next.

Sincerely,

Karisa

Why Blog my way through Turning the Page?

When I began writing Turning the Page July 8th, the day after my son’s funeral, I was grasping for the lifeline of hope. I was drowning in sorrow. How do you live the rest of your life, knowing that a part of you is missing? As I began seeking God’s face I realized that the disciples asked that very same question. When the miracle of Jesus’ resurrection was followed by his ascension into the heavens the disciples were asking, “Now what?” They still had to deal with Jesus not physically being present with them.

Jesus promised the comforter would come when he left. And boy did he. This rag-tag band of followers were filled with the Holy Spirit and became powerhouses for the gospel! I am realizing that day-to-day the Holy Spirit is turning the page with me. He has a plan for me, and my son’s death is not the end of my story. God is comforting me, equipping me, and teaching me to grieve with hope.

As I Turned the Page and began blogging I wanted to reach beyond my friends to a wider audience. Writing is my way of leaving my unique, God-given perspective on the world. I want to offer hope to those struggling with depression, as well as those survivors of suicide. I want to become a resource and witness to resiliency. There is life after tragedy and I want to live it to the fullest!

This hope isn’t just in reuniting with my son Jonathan in heaven, this hope is for the here and now! Jesus came that we might have abundant life here. How in the world can you have abundant life after your eighteen year old child takes his own life? You may be wondering the same about your own loss, turmoil or pain. Turn the Page with me and we will find out together.

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Suicide Hotline

National Suicide Hotline

If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call the National Suicide Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or go to the website at  SuicidePreventionLifeline.org.